Neeraj Gupta

I simply wonder where to start and where to end .......If I can end at all. There are memories, memories and more memories. Now I feel, that during the eleven years we spent together, I did not realise when Neeraj (ng as I used to call him affectionately) changed over from a son-in- law to a son and ultimately to a dear friend with whom I could discuss any subject on earth.I remember how eager he used to be to drop in at our place for an hour or so for a chat and coffee whenever he could find time between the meetings.

I specifically remember one sunny day during the last winter which he spent with me at the terrace of our house.He was so excited and was repeatedly telling me "papa, this rooftop is like heaven. I wonder how I missed it all these years.Now onwards I will make it a point to spend at least one day in a week on this terrace" He was also continously explaining to me his share of designing in the buildings near the malls in Vasant Kunj overlooking our house.But as luck will have it due to changing weather and failing health he could not have another chance to spend time on the terrace.
However whenever I am on my terrace, which is almost a daily ritual I feel he is waving at me from the heavens above as if to tell me"dont worry, I am here with you."

I went to see Neeraj last December, and we got talking about meditation. He told me about expereinces he had been having in his meditative state ... when he felt he became part of the cosmic consciousness, and was able to tune into the energies and intimations of the other world. I told him that that is the essence of Advaita ... non duality means that we are all part of a common energy form, we are all one. This physical world casts a visor (maya) over our inner consciousness, and the intent of meditation is to quieten the mind enough so this inner self can reach out and embrace its true form.

Neeraj was immensely excited by this conversation, and felt comforted that I had "got" what he had experienced.

I spoke to him a few times on the phone, and one last time shortly before he left us. Each time I spoke about this union, and each time I think he felt comforted. I believe that one reason for that was solace in the knowledge that even after death, he could still be part of our lives, that he would still be around to guide and support Anupama and the kids, that he could still be there...

And every day, I still feel his presence and his spirit. He still is there.

Neeraj was so much more than a beloved Son, Husband, Father, Brother and Friend.  He was a force and source of positive energy !  He affected every life he came in contact with.  He lived for the moment  like there is no tomorrow, when he hugged he enveloped you and when he loved he did it unconditionally ,with his whole heart.

He opened doors and pulled chairs for women ,loved popcorn , midnight maggi and movies, tickled everybody’s hearts young or old alike, children were his weakness, meeting friends over coffee and enjoying good meals gave him joy, took pride in his work and remained humble in ashram duties, he was generous and would gladly give you his last rupee without hesitation. 

He fought his illness valiantly, He never quit, never complained !  

He has been and is my best friend and I believe he is still with us, watching over us

Although I miss him every moment and there is a huge void in our lives, I know his love never ends, it knows no boundaries and has no earthly limitations.

Till we meet again…

 

Leisure